Ideal Version of You, Part 3: People

Today, we’ll define the third part of your personal constitution: how the ideal version of yourself will treat other people. 

We can probably all agree that relationships are complicated. They can bring great happiness, productivity and inspiration. But they can also go in the opposite direction, often for unknown reasons.  

In most cases, the fate of a relationship is determined by the accumulation of hundreds of little interpersonal interactions. 

If we can ensure that the vast majority of these little interactions make both parties feel just a little bit better, a good relationship becomes highly likely. 

It’s no use expecting others to do this for us. The only person in the relationship we can control is ourselves.

So, let’s take this control now. 

Special Wednesday 5-minute action Draft your own interpersonal interaction constitution

 

A good constitution segment is no longer than 2-3 sentences. It should be simple, clear and memorable. 

Here are some helpful guidelines for drafting a good interpersonal interaction constitution: 

  • Prioritize quality over quantity
  • Emphasize the importance of doing the small things right
  • Use the bucket philosophy

The last point comes from a great little book by Tom Rath (highly recommended). Basically, your emotional bucket is continuously filled by positive interactions or emptied by negative interactions.

A full bucket makes you feel awesome. And developing yourself to the point where you can regularly make other people feel awesome is a surefire recipe for success.  

From this mindset, my version looks like this:

I will maximize the quality of my human interactions, while controlling the quantity. Every interaction will fill the other person’s bucket, even if it’s just one little drop.  

Every little interaction counts. Therefore, the use of a personal constitution to shape yourself into an automatic bucket-filler is a very smart move. It certainly was an eye-opening experience for me. 

Please give this a go! The people in your life will be very grateful 🙂

See you tomorrow for part 4 of your personal constitution!

PS: If you haven’t checked out the first two parts, they are available here: health and creativity.