relationships

I\’m a research scientist. Part of being a good scientist is the ability to focus intensely on your work. This is something I was so good at that many other areas of life just kind-of faded away.

My relationship with my parents was one of those areas. I live in Norway and they still live in my home country, South Africa. When I\’m there to visit every couple of years, I\’m generally warm and friendly. But when I\’m back in Norway, I just disappear into my work. 

After many years (and after my brother also moved to Norway), this started to really affect my mom. Her nest was now well and truly empty, with both children having permanently migrated 14000 km North. 

As a writer, part of the problem was her struggles to get going in the morning after my dad left for work.  Meanwhile, up North, I was also struggling to establish a fully consistent morning routine.

I recognized that my missing link was something to force me into complete consistency. Could this be an opportunity? To find out, I arranged a daily 6:30 Skype chat. 

My initial expectations were rather low. My mom writes romance novels and I write research papers, so I had no idea what we would talk about every day. I also wasn\’t sure if either of us would stick to the commitment. 

But my concerns were misplaced 🙂

Today, 18 months of daily Skype sessions later, this morning habit is as deeply ingrained as brushing my teeth. My mom is much happier, my relationship with my parents is much improved, and my mornings are well and truly mastered. 

If you are still doubting the power of the accountability buddy, I really hope this little real life story provides some inspiration. Just give it a try!

Do you have a friend or family member you know deep down you should spend some more time with? This is the ideal opportunity. In my experience, it can easily turn into a lovely win-win scenario 🙂 

Please give it a go and let me know of your experiences. 

See you tomorrow!